I don’t think I have ever been consciously collecting stuff.  Maybe because I saw how my late dad holding onto every single power tool and building supply that came his way led over the years to an overstuffed garage in which it was difficult to locate what he needed when he wanted to fix something.

So when my son, around the age of six, started collecting stuff such as football cards and various book series, I got a bit nervous.  Had my reluctance to having too much stuff made him a hoarder, as my dad hoarding tendencies had made me feel wary in the presence of too much stuff?

Get Organised and Beyond Singapore Collecting Turns Into Hoarding

Photo by Robyn Budlender on Unsplash

Since working as a professional organiser, entering many people’s homes and lives and doing a fair amount of reading on the topic, I’ve come to realise that most people collect something, whether it’s free hotel toiletries samples or caps, but that their collections don’t necessarily make them hoarders.

So what are the differences between collecting and hoarding really?  The table below summarises my findings:

 

COLLECTOR

HOARDER

Items collected

Limited and specific e.g. caps, free hotel toiletries, Star Wars or Hello Kitty memorabilia etc.

Wide and random, including stuff other people will see as trivial and trash

The way the items are kept / stored

Methodically

Often displayed

Randomly

Often stashed in a cabinet or left on any possible surface

The way the items make you feel when you acquire them

Satisfied

Ashamed

The way the items make you feel when you see them

Happy

Safe yet guilty

The way the items make you feel when someone sees them

Proud to show them and talk about them

Embarrassed. In fact, you’re probably trying to avoid having visitors

The way you feel when you need to discard stuff (not necessarily your collection)

Not necessarily easy, but ultimately feeling freer

Extremely anxious, quite often resulting in the inability to throw anything

Get Organised and Beyond Singapore Collecting Turns Into Hoarding

Now before you assume you’re a hoarder, be aware that it’s normal for most people to feel some degree of embarrassment because of all the stuff they’ve accumulated and feel anxious at the idea of decluttering.

The signs to watch for if you think you are hoarding are:

  1. Your “stuff” interferes with your everyday life. The piles of stuff in your home make it difficult or impossible to use most of your living space, to move from one room to another, or to perform daily tasks, such as cooking, bathing or even sleeping in your own bed.
  2. Your living conditions are unsafe – high risk of tripping or setting the home on fire, or unhealthy – resulting in allergies or even respiratory problems for example.
  3. You tend to live in isolation and can experience some anxiety disorder or even depression.

Based on the number of people I’ve helped over the last 5 years as a professional organiser, I’d say hoarding touches less than 5% of the population.

Did my son belong to these 5%?  No, he was just a collector as many children are.  In fact, he has happily let go of all his collections when it was the right time for him to do so.  At 15, he asks me once in a while to help him declutter his bedroom because he appreciates it makes him “feel lighter and freer”.

Get Organised and Beyond Singapore Collecting Turns Into Hoarding

Now, I think that whether your level of clutter is severe or not, you too should do something about it because whether you realise it or not clutter ruins your life: it harms your health, it hurts your relationships, it derails your career and it drains your wallet.  Ultimately it affects your well-being.  Of course, different interventions need to be taken if you’re a hoarder, but that topic is worth a separate post.

In the meantime, don’t hesitate to contact me if you too want to learn to let go of things that are just stressing you out and feel in control of your home and life again.

 

Get organised and make room for life!

Nathalie